well shawn is in his third week in jail without work release. I hope the court appointed lawyer can get a motion hearing soon. without his income it's gonna get pretty hard around here. and to add to everything, my case worker can bring me up for contempt of court for violating the no unsupervised time with the kids. if you remember this post from 3 months ago the judge gave me weekends but then a provision was added that the kids' therapist had to approve any visits. yes, yes I know what i did was against the court orders but when my kids call and are at the point of killing each other.....i would just go get them for the weekend. There is also a possibility of her starting termination proceedings on my parental rights. Shawn is back at court tomorrow for the final arguments and the judges verdict. i am about going crazy with all the bull shit going on. i just want it all to end. I still haven't found a job. i went down to the Social Security office and applied for SSI and SSD. i guess i am "officialy" disabled now. whoopee!!! People have told me for the past 3 years that "it will all work out" I am not so sure.